How to Know if You're a Worthy Human Being
A comprehensive checklist.
I’ve been focused lately on learning to address — and change — one of my core beliefs: the idea that I am unworthy.
What do I mean by that?
It means I am less than other people.
It means I am hopelessly naive and uncertain.
It means I need validation and praise from others to prove my worth (and conceal the reality that I’m not actually any good).
A simple guide to worthiness.
I know I’m not alone in struggling with that kind of limiting belief.
So I thought it might be helpful to provide a quick guide to what you need to do to become worthy.
Think of it as a checklist.
If you can tick every box, then you are worthy.
I’m pretty sure I’ve got everything in there, so strap in.
Everything you need to do to be worthy.
Be here.
Phew. Let’s regroup.
I admit, it’s a shorter list than I expected.
And it’s even simpler than it looks.
“Be here” doesn’t mean “be present, live in the moment, focus your mind.”
It means “exist.”
If you exist, you’re worthy.
Of course there’s a much longer (basically infinite) list on the other side of the equation.
Things you do not need to do in order to be worthy.
Make lots of money
Be in amazing shape
Cause other people to be happy
Cause other people to like you/love you
-∞ Be perfect
I’m not suggesting you shouldn’t do things that lead to some of these outcomes (not the last one — that’s just silly).
Behaving in ways that enhance your life and make you and other people happier is a great idea.
I am saying this: you don’t have to do any of it to be worthy.
If you’ve been feeling miserable lately and laying on the couch for days bingewatching Netflix and mainlining Cheetos and M&Ms — that sucks and I’m sorry.
You probably don’t feel all that healthy.
You might be upset with yourself.
But you’re still worthy.
When unworthiness attacks.
If there’s one iron law in life, I’d say it’s this:
Sh*t will get f*cked up.
Something will go wrong at work.
You’ll get in a fight with your partner.
The electorate will pick an absolutely shocking candidate to be the leader of your country.
In the past, I always felt I had privileged insider knowledge about those kinds of events:
It was my fault. Always.
My “reasoning”:
My unworthiness led me to act (or fail to act) in ways that were singlehandedly responsible for causing the bad thing to happen.
I may have slightly overestimated my influence on world events.
But some part of me believed that everything that went wrong — from a dropped dish in the kitchen to a war on the other side of the planet — was proof of my unworthiness.
Worthy? Check. Now what?
If that you’ve ever had thoughts like that, even in passing, this might be a good time to revisit the “Everything you need to do to be worthy” checklist above.
Whether you had a hand in what went wrong (a relationship conflict, for example), or you absolutely did not (the war in Ukraine — unless Putin reads my newsletter), you are still 100%, certifiably worthy.
Knowing that, do you feel a little more able to stand up and figure out how to deal with the situation?
I do.
Things go wrong.
We make mistakes.
Other people make mistakes.
Vladimir Putin makes mistakes.
But as a worthy, worthwhile human being, you are fully equipped to decide what you’ll do next.